He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize