i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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