The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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