How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize