My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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