You made me cry and you don't even care
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
