I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
