So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
