every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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