My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
how do you play pong handcuffed?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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