I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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