He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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