Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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