I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
We have started to decorate penises.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
