she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
