just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
