I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
