what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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