just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
