Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
