apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
