A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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