Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I am one with the molecules
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
