what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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