Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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