but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
