ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
