weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize