I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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