For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize