Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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