I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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