If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
send nudes
from the living room?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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