Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize