I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
