it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
