well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Randomize
