We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
