Sponge bath it is.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
