i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize