Having a random hookup so left but love u
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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