Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
