Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
