She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
