i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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