ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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