I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
