hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
