Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
