apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
