Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
